The Story of John and Jen, Part 3

(See Part 1 and Part 2)

Friday, November 6, 1998

Kim helped me get ready for my first date with John. Red sweater, black slacks, makeup done perfectly. I wasn't all that interested in this guy, but I wanted to look good nonetheless. We were slated to meet at 10 pm at Bennigans, and though John's roommate Jeff had told him NOT to be late, he kept me waiting till about 10:10.

We ordered dessert and I encouraged John to order a beer if he wanted to. He jokes now that I tricked him into dating me by getting him drunk. (I kinda doubt that one Corona would have done that.) I will say that I was very impressed with his ability to flip a Corona upside down with one hand to make the lime float to the bottom of the bottle. I still can't do that.

Several hours later, we were kicked out of the restaurant when it closed. Time had flown by, and I remember being stunned that I felt like I was seeing into the heart of this man I had only known casually. After we left, we sat in my car and kept talking. I was having a great time.

And then I began to panic.

What was I doing spending all these hours with a guy I wasn't interested in? Was I simply rebounding from a guy who had broken my heart a few months before? Would I hurt John by leading him on? And I started spurting out warnings to John: "There are warning lights all over me. Be careful."

And suddenly what had seemed like a wonderful evening to him got very confusing. We parted ways and went home to our respective families.

John told his family he had met a girl and they all rejoiced. He tried to make sense of my confusing mixed messages.

I told my family and they were excited too, but the most important message I got was in prayer. As I prayed about the situation, I felt the Lord's peace come over me and an assurance that I was to trust God and walk forward carefully.

Sunday evening I met up with John at our church's evening service. After the service, I walked him out to his car and gave him a bag of homemade cookies. I told him he could pursue me.

Turns out, the pursuit was already over. We mark November 6, 1998 as the day we began dating.

The Story of John and Jen, Part 2

(See Part 1 here)

October 1998. John and I had become friends serving together on both our church's young adult worship team and our church's volunteer youth staff. One night after youth group, a group of us youth staffers went out for dessert to celebrate another staffer's birthday. John sat across from me in the hopes of getting to know me better. However, his efforts were thwarted when the youth minister sat next to John and proceeded to ask him question upon question about politics and culture.

However, John did give me a ride back to the church afterwards, so we did get a chance to talk. He learned that I was casually dating another guy on youth staff, but since all I did was complain about the guy, John's hopes were left intact.

The next Sunday, while the guy I was dating was around, I went up to my friend John and gave him a big hug around the neck. I probably did this to make the other guy jealous, but God used it to give John hope: John saw it as flirting and decided to make the next move.

Two days later, I got a carefully-crafted email (it turns out that John enlisted the help of his female intern in writing an email that was cool and casual). In the email, John said he was going to Sunny's birthday party that Friday night, and would I want to go with him? I ran over to my coworker Kristi's desk and showed her the email. "Is he asking me out?" I asked her. We decided he probably was.

Since I obviously wasn't too happy with the guy I had been seeing, and since I was impressed that John had the guts to ask me out, I decided I'd give him a chance. However, I had already made plans for Friday night with the high schooler I was mentoring at church (now one of my closest friends, Kim!), so I had an excuse to keep the outing brief. I turned down the party invitation but told him I'd meet up with him afterwards. We made plans to meet at Bennigan's at 10 pm on November 6, 1998 -- a date that would forever change my life.

The Story of John and Jen, Part 1

John and I celebrate five years of marriage on March 22. There have been tough challenges, sure, but there have been countless blessings as well. I'm so thankful God has given me John as a husband -- it's been one of many ways that He has smiled upon me!

I'm going to steal an idea from my friends Mary and Sarah and share "The Story of John and Jen" this month in several parts to remember the beginning of one of the best adventures of my life.

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The first time I remember seeing John was when I was home from college for Christmas break my senior year. I was on the summer worship team for my home church's college/young adult group, so I was surprised to see someone I didn't recognize leading worship that Sunday. I turned to Sunny, a girl I had just met, and asked who the guy was playing guitar, and she said, "Oh, that's John." I went back to worshipping and didn't give it another thought.

After church, the girl went up to John and told him about the girl sitting next to her who had been checking him out. Excited, John asked who the girl was, and Sunny could not remember my name. By then I was gone, and off to college for my final semester, and John was furious at his friend for dropping the ball regarding a girl who was apparently interested in him.

Eleven months later, I told my new friend Sunny that I had gone on a date with John. And suddenly she remembered who it was who had been "checking John out" that morning.